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Firefly

from Dead Reckoning by Kate Fenner

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about

for Kaari Upson

lyrics

Firefly

Who were you really? Maddening mystery, your absence fills the room.
The minute our eyes met, you knew you had your audience—
Now the curtain falls and it’s dark as a tomb.

Tough, fearless and girlish and vain, you could drink any man under the table. Not restless, not drawn to it, you were the flame—could it seem anything other than fatal?
All there, not there, all seeing, all blind. I’m searching the dark or you’re burning my eyes. Speaker of truth, shot through with lies. Flickering, flickering firefly.

Not one for straight answers, you loved with such candor, your eyes searched the words for the form.
Feeling your meaning, carving your dreaming, your brush searched the calm for the storm.
So hard to leave you there, so hard to go—panic pinned you to the gurney. You said am I dying now? I said maybe? I don’t know. But you have what you need for the journey.

Feast and famine, outside of time. I’m sorry I’m mad that you left me behind. I still want to hear what you had on your mind. Flickering, gone dark, firefly.

credits

from Dead Reckoning, released January 15, 2023
Mark Spencer, piano.

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Kate Fenner New York, New York

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